Tag: perspective (Page 12 of 17)

Smile, will you?

June 27, 2018 / Sreenath Sreenivasan / 0 Comments

I had been bicycling uphill constantly for an hour and a half. I wished to reach a village called Marhi, 40 kms uphill from Manali, India.

At one point, the elevation was too steep for me to keep the bicycle in motion. I decided to stop catch a much needed breath. My heart was racing like that of caged mice on steroids. I leaned my head down to rest it on the handlebar and slowly let my heart rate drop with each deep breath.

In this incapacitated state, I heard a voice from behind.

‘Hey, where are you coming from?’ asked a man wearing a friendly smile.

‘I have been bicycling from Delhi. Today, I wish to reach Marhi, about 30 kms up from here.’

He took a good look up and down my petite body frame.

With an equal measure of wonder and resolve, he said,
‘I own a gym back home. But I myself feel quite unfit. I used to take a car from home to the gym and then exercise hoping to lose weight.
But today, after seeing you, I promise that I will get myself a bicycle and bike to the gym everyday.
You gave me great energy !’

I wondered, how could I, being in such a beaten down, tired state, could still energise a random stranger on the road?

His gesture eased my heart. I thanked him and continued onward.

At a point where I was vulnerable, this person acknowledged my presence, my pursuit and my grit and replenished me with energy.
I realised how much a person desires to be acknowledged.

Moving on, I saw a board on the highway that grabbed my attention. It mentioned the name of the army engineer who first envisioned and surveyed the Manali-Leh highway. I felt good to know of the visionary man who dared to dream of a highway in such treacherous terrain.

Further down the road, I saw construction workers toiling away under the full sun, building a section of the highway. A few kilometers ahead, there were people laying down optical fiber cables.

And I wondered, the names of these people will never appear on any sign board saying that they helped build a highway, or they laid the cables for the high speed internet we would enjoy.
Then, at that moment, I remembered how much I’d liked being acknowledged by the gym owner in the highway.

It is such a human quality after all!

Right then, I made a decision to wave at or give a thumbs up to each person I find working on the road.
And thereafter, no construction worker was ever left without a smile.
Some of them were apprehensive to smile. That just made me realise how rarely were they even acknowledged as humans.

This experience only made me believe that we should acknowledge and celebrate these name less faceless humans who work hard in oblivion to ensure our lives run smoothly.

Next time you find someone whose work would mostly go unacknowledged, choose to just smile at them, give a thumbs up, or if you can afford the time, talk to them for a bit.

Your attention and affection are precious.
Choose to ration a little of it to people who go unnoticed.
All of sudden, the world around you will embody more love and brotherhood.

It all boils down to your choice.

Smile, will you?

On Good Gossip

June 25, 2018 / Sreenath Sreenivasan / 0 Comments

For the past four days I have been riding in the mountains near the lower Himalayas. Most of the other vehicles on the road run on fossil fuels. There are motorbikes, SUVs, buses and Army trucks for the most part.
I barely saw another cyclist on the road.

And while all other vehicles on the road have it much easier, my vehicle runs on pedal power. All throughout my journey I have seen people mumble the word ‘cycle’ across the windowpane of their car. If it were a bus or a motorbike, I could hear the word, ‘cycle, cycle’ in the conversation that followed after spotting me.
I could make a good guess that for another five minutes, the people would be talking about the bicycle, the challenge and the spirit of human endeavour.

After a point, I realised how natural it is for people to talk about other people!
Some people like to call it gossip.
The word gossip has a bit of a negative connotation. But can gossip not have a positive spin to it?

As I imagine it, there could be two ways how we can create a culture of positive conversation.

1) Do something remarkable, something positive so that people can notice and talk about it

2) Always be on the lookout for good things people do. Try to start a conversation based on that inherent goodness.

I believe that by bicyling uphill in such a challenging terrain, I inadvertently gave people a positive topic to talk about.

Our actions need to be engineered such that they are remarkable, sharable and worth talking about.

While we are doing something as natural as talking about other people, we should also be mindful of the culture we are creating in the process.

Next time, when you’re with friends, choose a positive aspect to talk about and when you’re busy with work, always strive to do something remarkable, so that others have good things to talk about.

We can’t help but gossip.
Let it at least be refined
Let it be inspiring.

On importance of old school friendship in the age of social media

June 13, 2018 / Sreenath Sreenivasan / 0 Comments

We are living in times where we dwell in two worlds at the same time. One is the real physical world, where all our interactions happen, and one is the virtual world, where we curate how we want our life to be seen as.

In the real world, a person experiences a whole range of emotions. On one hand he experiences pain, sorrow, rejection, depression, anxiety, diffidence…
On the other hand he also experiences pleasure, happiness, exuberance, emancipation and a sense of confidence.
The real world is a kaleidoscopic experience of all these myraid emotions.

But in the virtual world one dwells in, one always projects the happier state of being. All pictures shared by someone, be it of a momentous point in life to the banal selfie stream, it all has a positive connotation.
On social media, everyone is happy.
All seems to be well.

But is it?

If our life was seen only through our curated virtual identity, all of us are living an incredible life with no trace of pain or sorrow.
But deep inside, we all experience challenging emotions as much as we enjoy positive ones.

Our indulgence with social media has consumed our time and mind space which would earlier be engaged with real conversations with friends.
With friends, we would talk about what pains us and what makes us happy in the same breath.
But now we don’t have time to speak to a friend. For some reason the dopamine rush of social media validation eclipses the experience a real friendship promises.

This culture of curating a happy state of being comes at a cost. The challenging emotions like sorrow and diffidence that test our character are being avoided at all cost.
But how will one shape his character holistically if he is in such a state of avoidance ?

In life, one should always strive to have a space to speak about what pains him, what makes him sad and how lonely he feels at times.
For such a space to exist, trust is a must.
And that can only be found in the company of a trustworthy friend.

Speaking about challenging emotions brings forth clarity in one’s mind about who he is, while avoidance only enfeebles and diffuses his identity.

If you wish to have great emotional health, foster a trustworthy friendship. And share things with a friend as frequently as you share your curated happy state of being in the virtual world.
It will do wonders to your understanding of your own self.

To your wholistic growth,
To acceptance of happiness and sorrow as it comes.

On engaging your mind

June 12, 2018 / Sreenath Sreenivasan / 0 Comments

We have a perception that going uphill is difficult. Trekking up a hill is always challenging isn’t it?
We have to expend a lot of energy to gain elevation.

And we think, going downhill is easy. Gravity works for us. We just have to lunge our way forward and find the ground waiting for us to land on it.

It is similar when it comes to bicyling. Going uphill is a challenge.
And going downhill is easy,
If,
If you have good brakes !

Today, I’d prepared myself mentally for an easy downhill ride. Things were going pretty smoothly and I didn’t even have to pedal to move onward.
But over time, the brakes seemed to be getting less and less efficient.
At one point, they were barely able to contain my speed downhill.

It was a matter of concern. I stopped and started again, trying to impede my pace by brushing my feet on the ground as required. At one point, the slope was too steep for me to contain my speed.

I chose to stop and started walking with my bicycle in tow.

I thought to myself,
‘Maybe I should check a video online about how to tighten brakes.’
I switched on my phone but there was no network in the hills.

Then I wondered,
‘Maybe, I should look for a bicycle shop on the way. Until then I can push my bicycle.’

But after walking for ten minutes I thought,
‘Why can I not try to fix it myself ? Even if I go wrong, I will learn in the process. It must not be that difficult to understand the mechanism.’

I stopped walking and rested my bicycle against a wall.
After tinkering with the disc brakes for five minutes, I was able to do something that made it work.
Now, I had to learn what I did that made it work !
So I did it all over again.
Once I understood the mechanism, I did the same for the other pair of brakes.

In ten minutes, I had a bicycle with perfectly functional brakes.
The two hour walk to the city was reduced to a half an hour breeze of a ride downhill !

On the way, I tried to understand my own thought process.

First, I tried to look online, to learn how to do something virtually. (Looking outwards)

Then, when that didn’t work, I looked for someone who could do it for me, and learn by watching. (Looking around)

When that too didn’t work,
I chose to apply my own mind to it. And I learnt how to do it by experience. (Looking Inside)

I wondered,
What an upside down way of approaching a problem !
Internet has become such a convenience that we completely bypass our own mental faculty from the circuit of learning.
If we can’t learn it online, we try to learn from someone who knows it already.
All the while, the power of our seminal mind enfeebles.

Applying our own mind to a problem is the surest way to learn for life.
We need to cultivate the mindset of a pioneer, who chooses to experiment and learn form his own mistakes.
Eventually he does come up with a solution.

I feel that the best approach to learning something or finding a solution to a problem is

1) Look inward first (self -learning)
2) Then Look around (peer-learning)
3) Eventualy, Look outwards (virtual-learning)

We need to rebuilt trust with our mind’s abilities and not spoon-feed it with information.

Next time, before you search for something on google or try to learn something new online, grant yourself some time and try to understand and reason on your own.

Your mind will not fail you. It will come up with answers.
Trust your own mind.
It is a powerhouse.

On Age, Marriage and Responsibility

June 11, 2018 / Sreenath Sreenivasan / 0 Comments

‘You have grown up quite too much now!’ remarked my mother over a phone call on my birthday.

‘Well yes, I have turned 28!’

‘Now it is time to be more responsible in life !’ she alluded.

‘We are not talking about marriage mom !’

Laughing at her fruitless attempt she said,
‘ But you are at the right age to take the next step in life.’

‘Will you listen to what I did today Mom before we continue further ?’

‘Yes , surely. Tell me.’

‘Yestersay, while trekking up a hill in the lower Himalayas, we noticed that there was a lot of garbage lying around everywhere on the route. It left me quite sleepless the whole night. The next morning, with our heavy backpacks and a garbage bag, we set forth to do our bit to make things better.
All throughout our 5 hour downhill journey, we knelt down and picked up as much trash as we could. In the end, my friend and I had collected a total of 5kgs of plastic from the trail.
Now, my dear mother, tell me,
Am I not taking responsibility ?’

‘ Yes, I am glad to know about how you decided to do your bit, when it was easy to just walk past and not do anything.’

‘Mom, I feel that one should not wait for an age to start taking responsibility.
I cannot promise to bring a bride home,
But I promise to be a responsible human being at every living moment.’

‘Do what makes you happy my son.’ she said encouragingly.

The conversation with my Mother on my birthday made me realise how we use an age as a benchmark to start being more responsible.
At a certain age, you should take responsibility of another person, start a family, earn a living, buy a house etc…
And most of us in the urban middle class succeed in doing all these things.

But accomplishing all these life imperatives does not necessarily mean we are being responsible.

Let me cite an example.

If one is not responsible enough to take care of his own health, exercise, eat well and sleep on time, is he in a position take care of another person?
If someone chooses to jeopardise his own health with vices and endanger his life,
Is he being responsible about the gift of life that has been bestowed upon him?

Once someone is responsible about his own health and well being, does he seek more responsibility to change things in the little world he dwells in?

Only when we start looking at the act of taking responsibility as a way of life, do we head in the direction of creating positive change both within and without.

Maybe while talking to kids, instead of saying ‘Be Careful’ we should say ‘Be Responsible’ more often.

I urge you to think about how responsible you are being about the immediate world that you interact with.
And try to be a little more participative, a little more responsible with each passing day. It should be a way of life !

Today, as I was approaching the end of the downhill trail, I saw two contrasting events.
Behind me was a group of young urban yuppies, choosing to throw wrappers on the trail.
In front of me was a group of village kids, sweeping the streets to keep the lanes litter free.

Now,
Who is older?
And who is being more responsible?

I leave you with that thought,
And the promise being responsible holds.

To a better world of our own making.

Once in a Lifetime

June 9, 2018 / Sreenath Sreenivasan / 0 Comments

‘Once in a lifetime.
Once in a lifetime.’

Repeated my 72 years young friend Pholung, as we trekked up a cliff on an island off the Andaman coast in Thailand.
We were ascending to reach a spot from where we could pssiblyp see a peculiar sea creature called ‘Dugong’, also known as the sea cow.

Phulong was spirited in each moment as he took tiny steps up the cliff. I would help him out with my hand at difficult spots but for his age, he was supremely fit.

At a point on the way when we stopped to catch a breath he turned to me and said,

‘You know, I have lived in Thailand all my life, yet I never came to this island to see this beautiful creature.
Now, I realise I have limited time on earth, and this is a once in a lifetime opportunity.’

‘And you are going to see a Dugong today for sure. Better late than never’, I said encouragingly.

‘Once In a lifetime.’ he kept on repeating with bountiful joy in his spirit. His eyes shone bright like an emerald in feeble daylight.

At that moment I thought to myself,

‘You know, it is quite likely this is also a once in a lifetime experience for me. Chances are slim that I will ever come to this remote island in the Andaman sea again.’

I wondered why, despite it being a once in a lifetime experience for both him and I, it held so much importance to him.
I guess, that at his age, he understands the importance of time and the finiteness of existence much better than I do.

But does one really need to get old to realise how most of the experiences we have in life are once in a life time experiences?
One does not necessarily grow older to be wiser !

Once we realise that most of the things we do as a chore might be the last time we do them, we might attribute much more value to the experience.

How many of us remember the last time we played in the school ground with our friends? Or the meal granny would cook for you whenever you visited her?
The last time you appeared for a written exam?
Or the last time you embraced a loved one you are not together with anymore?

Chances are that none of us remember the last time we did these things. Because these things became so mundane that we didn’t attribute them the value they deserved.

Had we cherished each of the above experiences with a solemn realisation that it could be the last time we experience it,
the event would have been much memorable. And you would have the same fascination and gratitude in your eyes as my friend Phulong did when we was ascending the cliff to see the Dugong.

Accept all everyday experiences with gratitude and you will make amazing memories filled with fascination and wonder.

The next time you embrace a loved one, or eat your favourite dish at home,
Gently remind yourself,

‘Once in a lifetime,
Once in a lifetime.’

To more fascination, gratitude
And light,
in your eyes.

I am a Volunteer for Life

June 7, 2018 / Sreenath Sreenivasan / 0 Comments

I’ve been riding my bicycle in India for ten days now. And it is the first time I rented a place to stay at night. On all other nights I would either sleep at a Gurudwara or a temple or at a friend’s place.
Today is my first paid stay so to say. I feel such a huge difference between the experiences of being hosted and paying to stay.
The place where I am staying looks like a chawl in Mumbai suburbs of the 90s. There is no fan, shower, Wifi, clean linen or even a doormat. There is a 50 watt bulb that infuses gloom in disptempered walls.
Frankly, it is quite a sad place.

But that is not what bothers me the most. I’ve stayed at places where I’ve had to sleep on the floor, in under construction houses and on one occasion I even spent the night on a bench at a bus stop.
I’ve spent most of my nights at a Gurudwara or a temple in India.
And I was totally okay with the utmost basic facilities I had at these places.

Why?

Because I was invited with open arms without any expectation of a transaction.
I had the freedom to move around and look for opportunities to help in the best manner I could.
I have volunteered in community kitchens, served food at the langars, swept floors, helped wash dishes for hours and on one occasion I even volunteered to clean up a disgusting community toilet out of my own desire to make things better.
I’ve slept in community halls on the floor after the long day filled with 6 hours of cycling and volunteering thereafter.
Yet, I have always slept like a baby and woken up with enthusiasm and purpose with the first light of the sun.

But today, in this enclosed space in the guest house, I feel sleepy, drained and devoid of energy.

I realised, maybe a transactional reality is not the context that brings out the best in me.
Here, at the guest house, I pay money and get a place to stay.
A transaction.
It doesn’t serve my spirit.

I would rather wish to engineer a context where I am free to contribute in whatever way I am capable of, at a place where I can engage with people and hopefully make friends and leave behind the place in a better condition.

It is not even about being a stingy traveller, who is always careful with money. I contributed monetatily at most places I was hosted for free, because I wish these places to exist and multiply, so that we have another context to experience. Because I want places that foster brotherhood to thrive.

While I know, the people running this guest house need money for sustenance and I’m happy to give them business, I realised this is not the best context for me to stay at.

In the interest of feeling more energised , enthused and eager to contribute I would choose to stay at a temple or a gurudwara or a kind host’s place.

This experience also made me understand why people choose to volunteer even on weekends despite a busy work week.
Volunteering is such an energising experience!
It will only fill you up with love and hope.

Maybe this weekend, instead of choosing to sleep over till late in the morning and going out for a brunch at a restaurant, I would like to suggest an alternative.

Go to a Gurudwara and volunteer at the community kitchen. They accept help form anyone who is willing to volunteer.
Instead of spending money at the restaurant, eat at the Langar in the Gurudwara for free.
I assure you, the experience will only leave you happy and energised.
And you will wish to donate a fraction of the money you would have spent at the restaurant to the Gurudwara donation box.

It is a much better investment of time and money.

Tomorrow, I am going to leave my bicycle behind and trek with a couple of friends to Kheerganga, Himachal Pradesh.
It is likely that I will pitch up a tent for the first time in India.
Since I would be hosted by mother nature in the valley, I am wondering how to be of help to her.
I have a huge garbage bag folded up in my backpack.
Maybe, I will just pickup all the trash that doesn’t belong in mother nature’s lap.

I can’t help being helpful.

I choose to be a volunteer for life.

I hope you have a fulfiling weekend my dear friend !

On world environment day, where should you be planting a seed?

June 5, 2018 / Sreenath Sreenivasan / 0 Comments

While bicycling up the hills, I saw a school girl standing at the side of the road with a placard. I squinted my eyes to read what was written on it. It had a message saying,

‘ Tress are life, Each one, plant one.’

I smiled and asked,
‘For world environment day?’

She nodded with a beautiful smile.

I was reminded of my school days when I saw her. We would rally around the locality with big sign post and placards about environment conservation, shouting slogans with all our might.
We always thought of planting trees as environmentalism.
This thought dwelled in me for many years.
I even chose to volunteer at a reforestation community for 20 months, hoping to do my bit to make our earth a better place. I had many friends from my generation join hands and we all did our best to make a difference.

But today, despite being an optimist, I have my reservations about trusting the future generations with environment conservation. The reason being the artificial environment that our kids are growing up in.
Water comes from the tap, fruits and vegetables from the supermarket. They are distracted by the advent of an ominous technology that keeps all their attention fixated in virtual ecosystems.

If one hasn’t plucked a fruit from a tree, it is unlikely he will rally to save trees. Conservation should not be a last resort measure steeped in selfishness to save our own race.
It should come from a holistic understanding of the interconnectedness of all beings.

As mentors of the younger generation, the most fitting service we can do to save the environment is by sowing a seed, harvesting a fruit and tending to a garden with our younger friends. In the process, we will sow a seed for the love of mother earth in their heart.

Only when the future generations experience the miracles of nature first hand, will the motivation to conserve the environment come from the right place,
From deep in their hearts,

For the sake of life,
That we only know to exist at one place in the entire known universe.

On our bountiful pale blue dot.

The Body’s Wisdom

June 4, 2018 / Sreenath Sreenivasan / 0 Comments

It was a bright summer morning. With her baby in tow, my friend Laure walked slowly inside the community kitchen.

Since she looked a bit tired, I asked her,

‘Did you not sleep well? Your eyes look a bit groggy.’

‘Yes. It is because I never get an uninterrupted sleep at night. My baby wakes me up every night at 2 am sharp, asking to be breastfed.
It is a miracle how she wakes up at exactly 2 am everyday, no matter what!’

‘Well you have a natural alarm clock for 2 am !’ I quipped.

‘Yes, one that is beyond my control.’

‘At least you know how to turn it off’

‘That’s a consolation!’ she shared, staring at her baby dotingly.

It was fascinating to learn how a baby had such an accurate body clock.

This happened over an year ago. From then on, I made a conscious attempt to sense the time whenever I felt the need to know what time it was.
And gradually, I got pretty good at it.
I could guess the correct time within a ten minute window on most occasions.
Even right now, I guesed the time to be 5:21 am. I checked the watch and the time was 5:14 am. I only had the reference of my surroundings. The last I had looked at the watch was yesterday night. The only reference of passage of time was my own body’s sensation.

Since we all have access to the exact time in our watches or phones, we never think of sensing the time with our instincts. It almost seems impossible and bizarre to be doing that.
But ever since I developed the instinct of guessing the time first before checking it on my phone, I slowly came to realise that the body has a fairly accurate sense of passage of time.
We just have to learn to trust our body’s natural wisdom.

These days we have so many apps on our phones that help us keep track with our body’s mechanisms. But the convenience comes at the cost of our instinct.

One of my friends uses an app that helps him track how many hours of deep sleep he got at night. Every morning he checks these analytics in his phone.
But I felt, one can quite easily tell how well they slept by how they feel in the morning. We are outsourcing these simple tasks at the cost of our natural instinct.

There are apps that remind a person to drink water, to sleep, relax, to breathe…

If one has to be reminded of all these things, then one should definitely reconsider their lifestyle!

The human body has innate wisdom programmed into it. We just have to trust our natural instincts and with enough sentient practice, we will be much closer to the sensations of the body and our immediate surroundings.

My grandmother could tell the time from the phase and position of the moon, the call of a particular bird, the shadow of her house and sometimes, just by pure instinct.

Agreed that life wasn’t as time bound in my grandmother’s era as it is today, but the instinct of being in sync with our self and our immediate environment is worth cultivating.

The next time you have a need to know the time, try guessing it first before checking it in the clock.
Once you do it enough times, you will realise what a masterpiece the human body is !

If you have a recurring dream…

June 3, 2018 / Sreenath Sreenivasan / 0 Comments

The ability to dream is a gift we all have access to. Everyone, from the richest to the poorest of poor dream. In fact, it is not even a choice. If you sleep, a dream conjures up out of nowhere.

The imaginative human mind doesn’t stop dreaming even when wide awake.
We often call this state as ‘daydreaming’.
And unlike the involuntary nature of dreams we have while we are asleep, ‘daydreaming’ is pretty much in our control. We can choose what we want to dream about.

Some daydreams change as we grow up. Remember as kids how we dreamt of being pilots, firemen, clowns , soldiers…
Those dreams have definitely changed with time.
But some daydreams do not change with time. Especially the ones we have in early adulthood.
We all have dreams about mastering that one art form, travelling to a place unknown, to have a healthy mind and body, to be loved unconditionally…
These dreams take shape in our youth and stay within us.
And, we are all guilty of not acting on these dreams to make it a reality.
We take a few steps in the right direction but before we know we are off the track.
Remember that gym membership that you never really used ?
Instead, we do things that could rather wait.
We procrastinate.
We are pretty good at it, aren’t we?

But the dream still comes back to us,
Despite our failings.

It is easy to come to the conclusion that we are just lofty dreamers who would never act on our dreams.
Giving up on ourself is simple.
Losing faith is easier than believing in oneself.

But, if a dream keeps coming back to us, it must mean something.
I have always dreamt of being an early riser. I have failed so many times at waking up bright and early yet, I always wished I could do better.
It took me close to 5 years to cultivate a body clock that wakes me up before sunrise no matter what.
Repeated failings did not deter my motivation. The dream was still alive inside me. And while it was easier to give up on it when I was failing, I chose not to.

I had a similar experience with cultivating the habit of writing everyday. I have failed so many times at keeping a daily journal. But after repeated failings, I still was dreaming about it when wide awake.
I wondered, if the thought of writing regularly still lingers in my mind, it must mean something.
After 3 years of trying, I finally have cultivated the habit of writing everyday.

I am citing personal examples to emphasize how these recurring daydreams must be valued so profoundly by your psyche such that they don’t leave you despite repeated failings.

If you have a recurring dream that you never acted upon, or a dream you acted upon multiple times only to have failed to be consistent in the pursuit,
Do not lose heart.
Do not give up on yourself.

The recurrence of the dreams despite repeated failings is a sure sign that you must persevere.
And you will.

All successes stand strong on the bedrock of multiple failures.
Choose to stand up and try again.

Daydreams are the compass we must follow despite losing direction on the journey.

The most satisfying triumph is one when we transform imagination to reality.

With realising a recurring daydream, we have the opportunity to experience that feeling of triumph.

To more dreaming,
To more actions,
To more failings.

One day it will all fall into place.

Tag: perspective (Page 12 of 17)

Smile, will you?

On Good Gossip

On importance of old school friendship in the age of social media

On engaging your mind

On Age, Marriage and Responsibility

Once in a Lifetime

I am a Volunteer for Life

On world environment day, where should you be planting a seed?

The Body’s Wisdom

If you have a recurring dream…

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