Tag: Man’s search for meaning (Page 3 of 6)

Juggling Joy and Sorrow

January 11, 2019 / Sreenath Sreenivasan / 0 Comments

A candle needs, air to burn,
But along comes the breeze
For the sake of light, it puts up a fight,
Never looking for ease.

In wishing for Joy and running from sorrow,
Man makes up a mess.
For there to be light, shouldn’t there exist,
A blinding darkness?

As you run, into life’s arena,
Let Joy and Sorrow be either stride,
With a balance such, it isn’t a challenge much,
To perfect laughter shall your instincts guide.

Not in running away, but in running into
The battlefield shall you thrive,
For only in moments of battle, does a soldier feel,
Truly Alive.

Trust the stars, and frown not,
When life calls for a fight.
For would the sun ever set,
If there wasn’t beauty in the night?

Cultivate a farmer’s trust, and sow your deeds in the soil,
And fate shall blossom, from the beads of sweat,
Of all your toil.

Find equanimity in Joy, and courage in sorrow,
Let crystal clear be your sight.

Find the fuel, deep in you heart,
And with resolution, set it alight.

Set out in this journey, enthused,
With all you might,

And then, life shall enter your heart,
With all of its light.

A Poem for all Mothers

January 10, 2019 / Sreenath Sreenivasan / 0 Comments

Conception winds
A mother’s clock
To care for life.

The Proust Questionnaire

January 9, 2019 / Sreenath Sreenivasan / 0 Comments

Today, I would like to share an interesting questionnaire with you. It is called the ‘Proust Questionnaire’ named after the French writer, Marcel Proust.

Proust believed that foremost, a person must develop a thorough understanding of his own self. Only then would he be able to understand others.

He developed a list of questions that he felt would help people to reflect upon their own present beliefs and understand their true self.

While some questions might require a few moments of reflection, most others are best answered spontaneously.

Today, I would like to share my answers to the Questionnaire with you. I hope by the end of it, you also challenge yourself to answer the Proust Questionnaire.

My Answers to the Proust Questionnaire:

Q: What is your idea of perfect happiness?

A: Having the wisdom to realize how perfect each moment is.
Q: What is your greatest fear?

A: Living an unfulfilled life devoid of meaning.
Q: What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?

A: The tendency to procrastinate and not take initiative.
Q: What is the trait you most deplore in others?

A: Indifference

Q: Which living person do you most admire?

A: My Grandmother

Q: What is your greatest extravagance?

A: Flying in Airplanes.
Q: What is your current state of mind?

A: An excitement that comes with the gradual unfolding of a heart that’s ready to give and receive as dictated by the Universe.

Q: What do you consider the most overrated virtue?

A: Idealism
Q: On what occasion do you lie?

A: When I am not ready to share my state of mind.
Q: What do you most dislike about your appearance?

A: I have a frown on my forehead at all times. It is involuntary and unintentional. I wish I could change that.

Q: Which living person do you most despise?

A: —

Q: What is the quality you most like in a man?

A: The quality of taking responsibility.
Q: What is the quality you most like in a woman?

A: Compassion

Q: Which words or phrases do you most overuse?

A: Theek hai na yaar (It is okay my friend) usually to pacify a friend who is struggling with a narrow perspective in that moment.
Q: What or who is the greatest love of your life?

A: The gift of life itself.
Q: When and where were you happiest?

A: At all points in my life when I embodied the spirit of a child.

Q: Which talent would you most like to have?

A: The talent of singing.
Q: If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

A: I would like to have a better sense of humor.

Q: What do you consider your greatest achievement?

A: To have always listened to my heart.

Q: If you were to die and come back as a person or a thing, what would it be?

A: A Dolphin.
Q: Where would you most like to live?

A: Amid the chirrup of birds, in nature, in a community my friends and I build with our own hands.

Q: What is your most treasured possession?

A: My body.

Q: What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?

A: When a person ignores his ability to help. (Himself or someone else in need)

Q: What is your favorite occupation?

A: Tidying things up.

Q: What is your most marked characteristic?

A: Honesty
Q: What do you most value in your friends?

A: They care for my growth just as much as their own.
Q: Who are your favourite writers?

A: Kahlil Gibran, Gregory David Roberts, George Orwell

Q: Who is your hero of fiction?

A: Swami (From Malgudi Days)

Q: Which historical figure do you most identify with?

A: M. K. Gandhi

Q: Who are your heroes in real life?

A: Anyone who does what truly matters to them when nobody is watching.

Q: What are your favourite names?

A: Maya, Sreenivasan

Q: What is it that you most dislike?

A: Loss of Freedom
Q: What is your greatest regret?

A: Not apologizing at the right time.
Q: How would you like to die?

A: While working, as I am engaged in doing something I care about.

Q: What is your motto?

A: Be the change you wish to see in the world.

Hope you find time to answer these questions for yourself. It is a great self reflection activity that doesn’t take much of your time.

Good luck with finding your answers 🙂

A tale about a Mango tree

January 8, 2019 / Sreenath Sreenivasan / 0 Comments

In the village of Karmapur, there stood a young mango tree in a small farm. In the ten years of its life, the mango tree had never flowered and borne fruit. It was deemed an an infertile tree by the villagers. Nobody paid attention to it after a point, and it grew forlorn at the edge of a farm.

The farm belonged to a young farmer named Ramakant. He was facing a difficult time in his life. Repeated crop failures and famines had forced him to borrow from moneylenders at a huge interest. In hope that monsoon arrived on time, he sowed his crop and waited patiently. This was his last chance to get himself out of the debt trap.

The monsoon was delayed by two weeks already. Every passing day robbed him of a little hope. One evening, as he was strolling on his farm, he looked at the parched earth on his land. He looked to the sky but there wasn’t a single cloud in sight. The mango tree on his farm stood at a corner witnessing all of this.
A dejected Ramakant went to his house and got a rope. He climbed onto a branch of the mango tree and tied one end of the rope to it. He made a noose out of the other end and slid it around his neck. Tears were streaming down his eyes. He thought he had no other choice.
He had decided to end his life.

He jumped down from the branch he was sitting on, hoping to hang himself to death. But as soon as the rope got tense, the branch of the mango tree snapped. Ramakant fell down on the grown, injured his ankle and lost consciousness.

Soon, the villagers found Ramakant and rushed him to the hospital. He was unconscious for the whole night. The next morning, he woke up to the sound of deafening thunder and rain. Even though he found himself with a plastered foot in a hospital bed, he was happy to be alive.
The rain gave him hope.

After two weeks, he was able to walk on his feet again. He strutted slowly to his farm. To his delight, all the seeds he had planted had germinated after the rain. His little farm was bursting with a hundred shades of green.
He walked a bit further and stood under the Mango tree from where he had jumped.

What he saw took him by surprise. At the place of the broken branch where he had fallen from, ten new branches had shot out with great vigor. Tender leaves had appeared in place of the wound. The tree displayed the spirit of fighting to the very end.

Ramakant bowed down to the tree in gratitude. He had learned a profound lesson. As a mark of respect, he started to water the mango tree everyday.

Owing to a good monsoon spell that season, Ramakant’s farm got a bountiful harvest. He was able to start repaying his debts little by little.

In spring time, he got another wonderful surprise at his farm. The mango tree that was thought to be diseased and infertile by the whole village, bloomed with flowers for the first time ever in its life !

Ramakant was delighted to watch his mango tree flower. That summer, when he harvested the first mangoes from his tree, he was taken over by a deep, satisfying happiness.

‘Thank you my mango tree’ he said sitting on a branch.

The mango tree swayed with the summer breeze. It only sacrificed one branch to save Ramakant’s life. But that was enough to trigger a favourable turn of events.

For the rest of its life the mango tree gave plenty of shade and bore thousands of mangoes every summer. Ramakant watered it everyday and enjoyed its reassuring presence.

My New Year Theme for 2019

January 1, 2019 / Sreenath Sreenivasan / 0 Comments

It is the first day of 2019 !
Foremost, I would like to wish you a very Happy New Year.

A few days ago, I had shared an idea about why we should aim to have a New Year theme and not a list of resolutions for the New Year.

Following my own advice, I have come up with a year theme for the year 2019.

The theme for this year is :

PUTTING MY BELIEFS TO TEST

On a personal level, I have always felt that the way I lead my life might not always reflect the values I think I have.

Because, a belief has to go through the test of life to become a living value in a person’s character. It is easy to advertise or assume a set of beliefs as our own, but to truly live by them in each moment is a challenge.

For example,
I might believe that Non-Violence should be a philosophy I must adhere to. But in order for it to become a value I live by, I must practice it with great deliberation for years and put it through the test of life.

Each brick in the foundation of my values has to be cured by the kiln of life.

A few beliefs I have at this stage are:

1) TRUST IN THE UNIVERSE

I believe that the Universe has an exquisite design. Each action has a consequence, no matter how oblivious I might be of it. In that light, I believe in doing the best I can with the gift of Life.

Will Karma take care of the rest?

2) NON-DUALITY

I believe all of existence to be One.
We dwell in a cosmic pool of consciousness, infinite in every dimension.
If all of existence is One, whatever I do to someone else, is akin to doing the same thing to myself.

Then, what must I do with my time and my life?

3) CREATING GIFTS AND PRACTICING GIFT ECONOMY

This belief is a natural extension of the two that precede it.
As a human being, I must make the best use of my creative energy and share it with the world. The gift of life must beget more gifts for the world around me.

No matter how much I have, I must always be willing to share.

As rosy as it sounds,
Is there an inherent fairness in this parallel economy?

I will only know when the belief has been through the test of life.

I am mentioning just three of my current beliefs to drive home the point of why I am choosing to put them to test in this New Year.

How shall I do it?

By living mindfully, in practical adherence to all my beliefs.

My beliefs cannot remain cerebral concepts to be availed during discussions with friends. They have to be tested through.

This year I want to have an empirical existence.
Maybe an year is too short a time to test my beliefs.
But it is still a start.

I feel a nervous excitement inside me.
It is a good sign !

Have you thought of a New Year theme yet?
I hope you have.

This is going to be quite a wild ride.

Let the adventure begin !

A New Year theme is what you need

December 28, 2018 / Sreenath Sreenivasan / 0 Comments

For the past two years, I have been doing something unique regarding a New year resolution.
Instead of having a fixed goal in mind that I must accomplish, I would opt for the direction I wish to have in my life in that particular year.

I would choose a ‘Year Theme’.

Once I was clear about the theme, I would then decide on what my goals should be with regard to the theme.

So, in December 2017, as I sat thinking about an year theme for 2018, I wondered,

‘I have been having all these dreams that I have not pursued as seriously as I should. How can I have fresher, bigger, more ambitious dreams if I do not fulfil all the dreams I already have?’

And that’s when I decided to have the theme for 2018 :

EXHAUST DREAMS

That was the direction I wanted to head in. I wanted to pursue and fulfil all my dreams in the year 2018.

Which dreams/ goals should I aim at, was the next question.

I had chanced upon a TED talk by Patti Dobrowolski, where she endorsed the concept of drawing your future.

So I took a Post-It leaf and got to drawing.
The image you see at the top of the post was what I ended up drawing.

Here’s a list of what I had drawn :

1) Start your own website
2) Run a half marathon
3) Learn to swim
4) Finish a draft of a Book
5) Train your Ears
6) Find time to practice Drums
7) Be able to touch your head to the knees
8) Go on a Bicycle Tour
9) Start the Power of Everyday project

I took the post it and pasted it on the cover of my journal to serve as a daily prompt about the direction I must head in.

As 2018 draws to an end, I realised that I have made great progress with the year theme.

I started my own website this year and have been blogging regularly. I’ve completed two half marathon runs, I finished writing a draft of my first book, I went on a 7 month long bicycling adventure, and started The Power of Everyday project.

However, I could not really work as much as I would have wished to in the other four areas, the goals I couldn’t pursue to fruition.

While I did go to learn to swim for a month, I am not able to swim just as yet.
I did practise Yoga regularly, but it will take me another year to reach the pose (Paschimottanasana) I had drawn on the post it.
And since I was on the road for most part of the year with no access to drums, I could not practice regularly or work on ear training.

But even if I could only finish 5 out of 9 of my dreams, I have space in my mind to dream big, to dream anew.
The progress I’ve made this year on a personal front has been incredible !

From what I learned from this year’s experience, having a year theme helps channel your energy in one direction.

More important than having a New Year Resolution, or a set of goals, is to have a clear sense of direction, a year theme.

The theme can be about how you want to live your life in the new year,
what you wish to change, which area you want to improve on.
It should be short and easy of remember.

Also, drawing your goals in a piece of paper in line with the year theme helps to have structure and homegenity in your pursuit.
I highly recommend the drawing exercise.
A visual reminder that you draw yourself is the best map to reach the abode of your better self.

In the end I just have three things that I wish you do :

1) Create an Year theme for 2019

2) Write the theme down on a Post it and draw your goals in it

3) Paste it at a place so that you have to confront your goals everyday, maybe on your desk or on your journal

This activity is about setting a clear agenda and inching gradually in the right direction.

I can tell from my own experience that it will help you by leaps and bounds.

So, if you’re ready to bring a positive shift in the direction of your life, get thinking about the theme, and get drawing !

I will share my year theme for 2019 on the 1st of January 2019.
I hope by then you’ve decided on yours,
And we can start the new year, with our respective themes guiding us towards constant betterment.

To our collective growth !

A much needed touch

December 20, 2018 / Sreenath Sreenivasan / 0 Comments

Do you remember the day you touched a puppy for the first time?
The cutest one in a litter of three?
It would have been a long time ago, maybe a year before you lost your first milk tooth.

Remember how gingerly you would place it on your lap and watch it sleep? Its feeble heartbeat that you could sense on your palms, the caressing warmth of its supple skin?
Remember how when you touched it, it let a whisper of a shriek , touched you back and nibbled on your finger ?
And that feeling when you realized that something that you touch , touches you back with equal affection?

Chances are that you gave the puppy a name.
Tuffy, is it?

The touch was momentary, but the memory lives on.

Over time, there came new experiences of the touch.
Maybe you remember when you touched someone you loved for the first time.
The contour of their palm is etched in your memory forever.
When you touched them, they touched you back in equal measure. That was when the circuit got complete.

You felt a connection.

Chances are that they are not around anymore.

The touch was momentary, but the memory lives on.

Do you remember the first time you touched the earth?
Chances are that you don’t.

Do you remember the last time you touched the earth?
Chances are that you don’t.

I am not talking about the casual touch, the brushing of sand against your skin on a beach that you wish to sanitize as soon as possible.

I am talking about digging your hands into the earth, feeling the warmth of freshly dug up soil, picking up that deep, rich earth with absolute reverence.

When you touch the earth like that, just as the other instances,
The earth touches you back,
Welled up in the emotion of homecoming of an alienated son.

The first puppy, the first lover have gone far away from you.
But the earth has been waiting forever, in no hurry, holding a reserve of faith, that in time, your fingers will caress her.

Today, I ask you,
Would you touch her?

Maybe the circuit will complete.
And you will feel, a lasting, undeniable,
Connection.

Today is the day.

Roll up your sleeves, get on your knees.
She’s been waiting for far too long.

Just being

December 14, 2018 / Sreenath Sreenivasan / 0 Comments

The December wind, once a mighty gale,
Is feeble, warm, lifeless and pale
Carefree still, it flows ruminating,
It is happy after all,
Just being.

The icy mountain, what a blow it felt,
Painfully slow did the snow cap melt,
In between states of matter, still contemplating,
Is is happy still,
Just being.

The earth, a theatre in dilapidation,
Torn apart by borders, ideas of a nation,
Still it moves, silently reflecting,
It is happy after all,
Just being.

The sky a kaleidoscope of universes afar,
Today is a haze, without a single star,
A silent screen, it gets itself thinking,
It is happy still,
Just being.

The last song bird, it calls for a mate,
It will never hear back, a sorry fate
Still it finds solace in the singing,
It is happy after all,
Just being.

The wind, the ice, the earth, the sky,
Just as a sparrow and a butterfly,
Without a worry, they exist,
They’re so good
At just being.

While I, a human,
riding on destruction,
Am only good,
At just being sorry.

On finding equanimity in life

December 13, 2018 / Sreenath Sreenivasan / 0 Comments

The test of a first rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in mind and still have the ability to function.
– F. Scott Fitzgerald

We have all experienced that emotion at least once in life when we think that in the grand scheme of things, we don’t really matter.
In the infinity of the cosmos, the constant sourceless flow time, does a speck of a little being that appears and disappears in a flash hold any significance?
Yes, in the bigger picture, even in the observable universe, we don’t even feature as a faint blip on the cosmic radar.
One could thus infer that life is quite pointless, devoid of any meaning.

But wait a moment and think.

Don’t we also have the opportunity to find meaning for our life for our own self?

We have a finite amount of time to experience our perceptual reality and engage ourselves in something that we find meaningful.

It might not matter in the bigger picture, but in the present moment, what we do with our life and what adds meaning to it matters, doesn’t it?

So how does one find a middle ground while being confronted with apparent pointlessness on one hand and finding meaning on the other?

Here’s where the quote by F. Scott Fitzgerald comes in.

To make peace with pointlessness and meaning, we have to able to hold both ideas in our head at the same time.
And, it can do wonders to your existence.

On one hand, realising our pointlessness in the grand scheme of things will make sure we don’t become egocentric in our perspective.
On the other hand, choosing to find meaning for our own life and living by it will make us more responsible carriers of consciousness.

Once we learn to make peace with both these opposing ideas, of pointlessness and meaning, a certain stoic calm would dawn upon us.
In a way, we will learn when to take life seriously and when to just sit back, accept and laugh at how insignificant we are.

An image conjures up in my mind when I think about making peace with this duality.

Imagine a father and his 5 year old son peering through a telescope at a clear night sky.
The father looks at a minisclue fraction of the cosmos through the lenses and realises how little his existence is.
And then, he looks at his son gazing through the telescope in awe and finds all the meaning in the world to live fully and responsibly. To make the most out of his existence.
In that moment of realization, he’s made peace with his reality.

Perhaps the best way to stay clear of nihilism and egomania, is to understand the duality of pointlessness and meaning,
and live with a solemn awareness of both ideas each living moment.

How does one make peace with these polar opposite perspectives?

Perhaps, a telescope would help.
Or maybe,
watching your baby fall asleep.

Are you being a true friend?

December 12, 2018 / Sreenath Sreenivasan / 0 Comments

The internet tells me I have more than a 1000 friends in the online ecosystem.
There’s a good chance that you share a similar story.

But how does one get to know who their real friends are? Not just among the friends in the online space, but also in their physical world?

I feel there is way to find the answer.
And the answer is in the questions they ask you.

Even if we have been friends with someone for a while, we can spend years not going beyond the same old questions-

‘How are you?’
‘What’s happening?’
‘How’s work?’

You know the list !

But amid the cacophony of the same old peripheral questions, there will be a friend who’s questions will pierce straight through your heart.

He’ll ask questions that compel you to come up with answers you already have, to questions you don’t.

‘What is your dream?’
‘What do you fear?’
‘Are you happy?’
‘Can I help?’

These are simple questions,
and they must be attended to.

These questions can only emanate from the heart of a true friend.

Who is a true friend you’d ask.

In my opinion, a true friend is someone to whom your growth matters just as much as their own.

You can be friends with hundreds of people, but if you want to be a true friend to a chosen few, you must ask these questions to them.

And time and again, in the interest of fostering meaningful growth,
To form a deeper personal bond,
One must ask these questions,
To himself.

So,
As a good friend,
May I ask,

‘What’s your dream?’
‘And what’s holding you back?’

And, coming back to the question,
Who’s a true friend?

The answer is in the questions they ask you.

I hope you find a friend in me,
A friend in you.